11 April, 2015

J is for Jerk.

I know a girl.  She's very nice, sometimes funny  – often when she doesn't mean to be.  She's caring and reasonably reasonable.  She tries hard not to be overly demanding.  She's accommodating and works at being there for all the people she loves.

This girl, no matter what, brings out the jerk in men.  I don't know why it is.  I don't know how she does it (it's not on purpose). But when she embarks on a relationship you can guarantee its going to end badly for her.  Without fail.  Always.

The pattern is always the same:  discarded, deceived, confused.  There have only been two exceptions to this rule: one remains a dear friend of hers, who was the only true gentleman she ever dated, who took the time to break up with her in person and left her with explanations and dignity; the other is not of sound mind.
She happily admits that despite not reading self help books she ascribes to the school of "You teach people how to treat you" so she feels she does have to take responsibility for the years and years of heartache and dashed hopes. But what are you supposed to do with that if every relationship is different and you're just being yourself?

Are you just supposed to sit back and take the blame for other people being bastards?

Is it all her fault?

What causes people to act badly?  How or why do men justify to themselves the things they do that are so hurtful to the women they've claimed to love?  I surely don't get it, and I don't have any answers.

I'd like to know what you think.

This post is interactive.


  1. All you can do is be yourself. If you have done nothing wrong, then you can't blame yourself. New follower here. I'm stopping by from the "A to Z" challenge, and I look forward to visiting again!


    1. Thanks for your reply, Sylvia. I agree and that's what I say too. Be yourself. Looking forward to reading your writings at school pickups. :-) Good things! Sophia

  2. My theory? It's the schmuck gene... I think it's the daggy bit left stuck to the broken X chromosome when it mutates into a Y... with some guys it's fully detached, but with many others it hangs around all their lives...